(Maybe) a lot has happened. Or not. 

If living means waking up each day doing what you love, then I can safely say I had been living the life for the past month or so during this semester break. I wake up each day just anticipating to run or head to training; though it gives me really bad butterflies each time not knowing what trng prog coach has planned for us. 

I love my life right now. So much sometimes it still feels like a dream to me. 

This is a life I never thought I would be able to live. And it has exceeded my expectations. 

Everything is falling into place so well it seems so unreal at times, how. Uni life thus far really has been 100/100. So many (almost) wrong turns in the beginning but I suppose I am where God had planned for me to be at. And I guess too, taking a gap year off had shaped my perspectives on things and made me learn how to cherish my (last phase of) student life so much more. 

Joining tracks will definitely be my biggest takeaway. The amazing teammates I have in the team that constantly drives each other to do better, to never give up, I am ever this grateful to have them. It has once changed my opinions how running is just an individual sport. 

I’ve slightly more than 2 months time before SUNIG and tbh, my intention of joining tracks was to sustain my fitness routine of working out and also because of my love for running. Never had I even once imagine or dared to think of joining a competition/race because that is just plain ridiculous. But here I am. I told my mom just the other night over the dining table, “never would I have dared to imagine myself wearing a race bib for a race but that is going to happen in 2 mths time and IT IS CRAZY” my mom, she laughed for a good 5-8 mins upon hearing that. This is just it is. This is how much happiness and contentment running and tracks give to me. The smallest and slightest bit of thing has given me the biggest of joy I had long never felt in me. 

It has also saw a change in my personal growth, of self-love and body acceptance. Days when I start to feel negative and disgusted by my own body image, I am once again reminded of what my body can do than to emphasize so heavily on what I wish it would look like. And I am here to tell you, I am very appreciative and grateful for this body of mine. 

Trainings have been getting tougher and tougher these days but I guess while we whine & complain about the pain, there is so much satisfaction that comes out of it at the end of the day. And tbh really, to train on the same tracks where you occasionally see some national athletes train, it drives you even more to push harder. I do get frustrated at times, I wouldn’t deny. Or I may be starting to feel impatient about seeing improvements because I so desperately eagerly want to do well, better and my best. Slowly but surely; I will continue to remind myself. 

I can’t wait for school to resume soon, though I foresee myself struggle a little trying to juggle between my priorities of studies & tracks, but I know I am going to enjoy every bit of that. Like what my mom had said to me, “you only have this short period of time left to enjoy all of that. so just go ahead and enjoy it all.” 

I am so happy. So so so happy. 

Till then my dearest ones, I rlly hope life has been treating you fine and well too on the other side 💕

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